The WhatsApp Generation

January!Njaanuary! What a tough month it was. Tough enough it made me forget I was supposed to do a blog. Anyway let me stop blaming January and admit that I listened to the lazy voices in my head. On the other hand, January taught me a lot of stuffs. If this blog touches you and you know what I mean when I say touching you, I’m sorry but you just have to bear with the plain truth.

Just the other day while I was in town it started raining heavily. In Nairobi when it rains you will realize that the ladies can run faster than the men (I have never understood what they try to protect when the rains start pouring). I walked into one of the restaurants to have some coffee as I buy some time, you know the miracles that hit our fare structures when it rains, leave alone the miracle that Jesus Christ performed of feeding the 5000 men. I occupied the only empty table in the restaurant and ordered for coffee. Some few minutes later, there came a lady. Oh wait a classy independent lady walking like a boss in her high heels. She came over where I was sitting and asked, “Mind if I join you?” for heaven’s sake there is no way I would have turned down the request so confidently in a manly voice I responded,” No I don’t mind you joining me.” For some time I had the right to remain silent since I did not know how to start and maintain a smooth conversation with her. So there arose pin-drop silence between the both of us. Enough is enough I took my phone out and started chatting with some of my few pals who were online by then. All this time she was just giving me that bossy look which would make you blush a 1000 times. Suddenly my body was numb especially my fingers, I couldn’t text any single word at all, I was sweating profusely. When our coffee was ready, she broke the silence and hit me with a question, “So why are you having coffee all alone? “ Don’t you have a girlfriend whom you would invite over?” She added. I drew a light smile and just like any other man I was in a moment of confusion on whether to answer yes or no. So I just decided to say I was a single man. She laughed and uttered some heart touching words,” this WhatsApp generation is going to show us wonders, everyone is single nowadays.” Now that’s what I call a 10-Nil situation. I slowly returned my phone into my pockets. I never knew what she meant by the slung ‘WhatsApp Generation’. I requested her to explain more on the slang which I later learnt that it was meant for the 21st century youth.

She talked so many ills concerning the WhatsApp generation more so leaning on the male gender. The men nowadays cannot be compared to the 20th century men in any aspect. She said when she was dating back in the days when she was in campus, her boyfriend whenever they planned for a date would pick her at home then drop her back safely late in the night when the date was over. “Nowadays many men plan dates with their girlfriends then tell them to meet each other in town, after the date everyone goes his/her way back home,” she said. All this time I remained silent since I saw myself as an amateur in this game. I tried gaining some courage and confidence to defend the men in the so called WhatsApp Generation by saying that it is not in all men. In my defence I said that it’s the ladies who have forced the men to change and cease acting in a romantic way( I thought this would be my comeback but…this woman had some  Njoki Chege in her). She strongly disagreed and countered that if men treated their ladies like queens and owned them then the ladies would just be obliged to submit to the man. But if a man acts immature in the way he displays romance towards the lady, then she will be forced to look for another better man. The WhatsApp generation should refrain from more of phone-romance and put it into action. “In fact where do you guys find time to build yourselves if all the time you are glued on your phones?

This madam was speaking nothing but sense. She sipped her last sip, slipped her hands into her purse, took out her business card and handed it to me upside down and left. I looked at her as she left and then decided to look at the business card. I was shocked to find out that it was the real Njoki Chege. I think all the WhatsApp generation gentleman need to pay me for representing them in that lecture.

I took the positive aspects of the talk we had. It was a game-changing life experience. It’s the high  time I bring out the Alejandro game in me. Cmoon ladies and gentleman, let’s kick it the 20th century style. Men let’s treat our ladies whole-heartedly. Don’t be a player (applies to both genders) because you just end up wasting each other’s time. Time is of the essenceI tend to disagree with the nigga’s verse which says ‘treat these women like trash and they’ll treat you like a king, you treat them like a queen,they’ll treat you like trash.-Niggas 1:1-3. Not all ladies are created in the same way, if you had a bad encounter then I am sorry for you but don’t generalize the ladies. Ladies also do not generalize men with the common saying that all men are dogs. PAMOJA TUANGAMIZE UFISI!!!

Meanwhile Valentine’s Day is just a week away. Surprise your loved one and make them feel loved. Spend wisely within your financial budget. For those dating high-schoolers…you are just the lucky ones.

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At times he imagines if he never had the fighting heart where he would be right now.

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